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Donate NowThe Optimistics: Three Best Friends, One Shared Diagnosis and an Eternity of Hope
Alzheimer's touches everyone in its path. I saw it firsthand as a child, watching my grandmother, "Bubbe," succumb to the disease. For decades, Bubbe was my only understanding of Alzheimer's until I attended my first Alzheimer's Association Walk to End Alzheimer's® in Baltimore, Maryland, in 2022. Everything I knew about the disease changed that day.
During the Opening Ceremony, Dennis, who was diagnosed with younger-onset dementia in his early 60s, spoke about two men — Mike and Jim — who became more than friends. They became his lifeline. Once strangers, the three men found each other in a place that felt unrelatable — an Alzheimer's Association Greater Maryland Chapter support group in partnership with YES! (Young Onset Dementia Education and Support).
Their bond was instantaneous. Together, they refused to let their diagnosis define them, choosing hope over despair, and finding what they thought was impossible — optimism. As a dedication to their newfound mindset, they dubbed themselves The Optimistics. That mindset grew into something much larger — a symbol of resilience for others facing dementia.
More Than a Memoir — A mission
What began as a memoir about three men defying the unimaginable turned into something far greater. The more time I spent with Dennis, Mike, Jim and others at YES!, the more the universal message behind The Optimistics expanded beyond just the original three men.
My book “The Optimistics” encompasses more than 20 stories of individuals living with younger-onset dementia and their care partners. Each chapter showcases a unique perspective on finding moments of optimism through this difficult disease with love and hope at its core.
Here are the three "original" Optimistics.
Dennis: "The Godfather"
"Dennis is like the Godfather of the group… well, somewhere between the Godfather and Mel Brooks." — Mike
Dennis is not the leader by choice — he is a leader by nature. People are drawn to him. When someone speaks about Dennis, they often place a hand over their heart and say, "Isn't Dennis just the sweetest?" The first time I met Dennis, he skipped the handshake and went straight for a hug.
He takes care of others by checking in on fellow Optimistics, asking how their families are, and sending messages just to make people smile. He gives out so much optimism, yet he also knows how important it is to hold onto some for himself.
Dennis understands what it feels like when Father Time tries to pull those living with Alzheimer's and other dementia into the shadows. Instead of fading, he fights back. He smiles through the pain, knowing that every moment he wins is one more moment with the people he loves.
Mike: "The Poet"
"These guys are like the mortar between the bricks that keep us bonded when we're going through hard times."
That is how Mike describes his brothers Dennis and Jim. Mike defies expectations. He has outrun many of the setbacks that the disease brings, such as maintaining his independence. But his greatest strength is his words.I call Mike "The Poet" because when he speaks about his condition, he refuses to let Alzheimer's define his story. He talks about life with younger-onset dementia on his own terms, without fear and without surrender. Just over a year ago, Mike stood outside the Department of Health and Human Services in Washington, D.C., calling attention to the crippling cost of prescription medication for those living with Alzheimer's and dementia.
Mike speaks about the shock of his diagnosis, how it has rippled through his family and how, at first, he felt alone — until he met Dennis, Jim and the other Optimitists who would become his extended family. What was once a fragile outlook for Mike is now unbreakable. It's the sense of unity that gives Mike the strength to show others there is hope. Mike knows what his future holds, yet he stands firm, defiant and unshaken — he is a soldier in the fight against dementia.
Jim: "Mr. Lighthouse"
At 6' 5" and built like an NFL tight end, Jim makes an impression the moment he walks into a room. No matter the sport — even if Jim had never played it before, he would master it. Jim's athletic talent took him to the collegiate level, where his wife, Terri, says he was "The Big Man on Campus" both on and off the field.
It was not just his athleticism and size that made Jim stand out — it was the way he welcomed people into his life. Mike refers to Jim as a lighthouse because at his first YES! support group meeting, it was Jim who stood at the door, welcoming Mike with open arms. That is a small example of who Jim has always been — a guiding presence and comforting confidant.
Eternal Optimism
Since writing "The Optimistics," my life has changed in ways I never
expected. I watched The Optimistics change as well. Some of the people I interviewed have moved into care facilities. One person passed away. Many no longer remember me. Yet, as things change that are out of my control, one thing remains: No one facing Alzheimer's or dementia is alone.Through their journey, The Optimistics unknowingly changed mine. They taught me the power of time and how to prioritize what's most important in life. They showed me that with love and support, you can drive past the agony this disease brings. Most importantly, they allowed me solace to see that regardless of the roads ahead, there is always someone by your side.
It's in those feelings you will find eternal optimism.
About the author: Richie Frieman has been dubbed a Modern Day Renaissance Man by Macmillan Publishing and St. Martin's Press due to his unique career path. He is a #1 best-selling, award-winning author and illustrator of eight published books across multiple genres. “The Optimistics,” Frieman's eighth book and debut memoir, has won two prestigious honors from the Best Independent Book Awards (BIBA) — Best Non-Fiction Book and Book of the Year — and has received praise from multiple media outlets. He currently resides in Baltimore with his wife, two kids and dog, Tucker. Follow him on Facebook, Instagram, X and LinkedIn.